ladies, when writing a CL dating ad...

dating on craigslist

You’re posting on craigslist looking for a man (or two). As one who found his true love on CL 4 years ago (via her CE ad late on Sat night), I’d like to share a few things that might improve your search results. My advice is free but from a man’s perspective these are the kinds of things that will probably improve your odds and increase your chances.

First of all you’re running an "ad" not an "add". While we’re on the subject, run your CL post through a spell checker please. Some of us notice sh*t like that. Ignorance ain’t sexy. In fact it’s a real turn off. If you can’t spell or use proper grammar, you’re more likely to fuck ignorant men. You’re choice. That may be your goal. Or maybe some men like taking advantage of dumb chicks.

CAPITAL LETTERS ARE THE ONLINE EQUIVALENT OF SHOUTING. PLEASE DON'T YELL AT ME! WE DON'T EVEN KNOW EACH OTHER YET SO WHY SCREAM AT A STRANGER. YOUR TYPING LOUD ENOUGH AS IT IS.

Good men come in all shapes and sizes therefore not all good men are 5'10" or taller. In fact, the man of your dreams may turn out to be shorter than you. I’m not height challenged but I still think the taller-than-me-or-else requirement is incredibly shallow. Besides, who cares how tall you are in heels? Are you so insecure you need a Tall Man to protect you? If so, you’re not the one for me. I guess the "be this tall" requirement helps one weed out the bozos.

Be honest. If you’re not HWP, don’t lie. It’s obvious the first time someone sees you. Any hope you have of proving you’re greater than the sum of your parts is lost when a man discovers you began by lying. You’re free to avoid those who demand Barbie dolls just as others are free to demand the truth.

BBW seeks HWP I don’t get this one. You admit you’re large but you want your dream date be fit, trim, toned, athletic, ripped, etc. What gives here? I may be flawed but you need to be perfect. Do you see the disconnect here?

One of online dating’s shortcomings is the ease with which connections are made and broken. A shallowness can seep into one’s online life because the anonymity of one’s online persona allows for behavior one would admit was rude and somewhat callous in person. The social checks and balances are missing without face to face contact coupled with personal identification. Be nice, play fair, and don’t hurt anyone.

Alas alack. It appears that the balance of power still rests with women, online and off. I’m always shocked when I hear women talk about the flood of responses they get. The inverse of a man’s experience I’m afraid.